Let's Talk (About Trust and Other Things)

In the previous "Let's Talk" post, "Anonymous" made an interesting comment regarding preparing to be a worker at home:

"I guess it would be smart to do that but who knows if I'll ever get married? What if God doesn't bring the right [sic] person for me, would planning for being a homemaker be a waste of my time? "

It is possible that any and everyone who hopes to get married someday has doubted at one time or another if Mr. or Ms. Right is really out there. I've wondered that. Probably you have, too. We fear our hopes being disappointed. What could be worse than planning on marriage and never finding "the one"? Sometimes we may just want to say, "God, show me this person, please, so that I can really know he is there and that this waiting for him will be worthwhile."

But if God shows us beforehand how He will plan our days, then where would be the growth? He does not give us His plans for the future because He wants us to learn to trust in Him; whatever happens, He wants us to lean on Him. I can't preach on this (or anything for that matter.) I can't speak on this as someone who has her hope completely, unshakably in Christ all the time. But I can say as someone who has struggled and still struggles with giving everything to God, that once we do surrender our fears to Him, something beautiful grows in the place of our fears:

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."

(1 Peter 2:3-4) In Girl Talk by Nicole Whitacre and Carolyn Mahaney, some good insight is offered concerning this verse. It is pointed out that a 'gentle and quiet spirit' is referring to trust in God. If the spirit is trusting God and resting upon His faithfulness, then it is beautiful in God's eyes. That is the beauty that God wants us to nurture, so that whatever happens in life, we will still be depending on Him. He may choose not to provide us with a spouse. He may call us to a single life of being devoted to Him. Yet whatever it is, we can know that what He chooses is best, and that He will not leave us to face our struggles alone.

Now, "Anonymous" does pose another interesting question: Is it worthwhile to pursue learning to be a homemaker when you believe that it is possible that you will remain single for a long time, or perhaps for the rest of your life? Carolyn McCulley is a single Christian woman whose insight I respect because she seems to base her views on the Bible. In a recent post on her blog she wrote,

"I'm a big proponent of single women cultivating a love for the home. Not only does this help balance the over-emphasis on the public sphere of life (a job is not everything that defines us), having a heart for the home means we will invest in the private sphere in terms of skills, time, and money--and thus be prepared to offer hospitality to both bless God's people and to reach out to others. "

Ms. McCulley's point was reiterated by Lydia T.'s comment, which states:

"Learning how to be a homemaker is more than preparing for the future. It is a way to minister to your family. Cultivating relationships is not only done through spending time with someone, it is also done by serving--your family and your friends through hospitality. By sharing some of the responsibility in your household, you are opening up more opportunities through which your whole family can minister. By working together, more can be accomplished as a whole than if each person is only looking out for himself.

Keeping home is education in and of itself! Not that learning physics and Latin is wrong, but neither requires the exclusion of the other. This would be where time management comes into play."