By Hännah Schlaudt

Meg had restlessness deep in her soul, and it peeked out as she sat swinging her legs under her chair and played with the ice cream in her bowl. “I just don’t know. The whole submission and calling to be a wife and mother thing—just doesn’t seem to be enough. I want to do something really useful and satisfying with my life. I want to see the world, to live and to do something worthwhile with myself.” Her clear bright eyes shone as she rambled on about her dreams of living in Europe and being a freelance writer and photographer, free to do as she pleased with her life without the chains of family and husband to confine her. “After all,” she rationalized, “I don’t think I know a guy I could stand to have as a husband.” I ate my ice cream slowly, nodding and listening and pondering on what she said. I had some of the same dreams myself, but I wondered if she was sailing toward them guided by different stars from the ones I knew so well. Her heart and her dreams did not seem wrong in the least by the world’s standards, but compared with the rich ideals laid out in Scripture, they were grasping at wind and empty of much more than selfishness.

Kara was just the opposite of Meg. When I first met her, I was delighted to meet a girl so old-fashioned and feminine. I hoped I’d find a kindred spirit in this sweet girl. However, my heart grew increasingly perplexed by her. Smart and sweet, she ought to have been active in the church and community, using her time to hone her skills as a math tutor and to serve children in the area. Loving children and quite capable of being a dear friend and an encouragement to everyone, I expected her to be married early on. But time crept on and she saw her twenty-fourth birthday come and go, and was still very single, living at home and helping her mom with chores about the house and reading novels in her free time. I sometimes wanted to weep after talking to her. How much of her life has she frittered away as she sought to be the ideal, dutiful daughter and wait patiently for Prince Charming to approach her dad and whisk her away into “real life” and that perfect home of her own?

These girls, and others like them, have driven me on a chase through the woodsy hills and dales of theology, God’s Word, and my own heart and mind. What is the biblical definition of femininity, and which of these girls’ views is the right one? I’d read some on this topic, but certainly not extensively. However, I do believe that God has laid forth in His Word clear principles for what defines biblical femininity that can help us sort through the cultural clutter and sin nature to get at the root of what it means to be a woman, made in the image of God and living to the fullest a live submitted to Him for His glory. Let’s seek out this definition together, shall we? And let’s try to stalk down how God intended for us to apply that definition of biblical femininity to where we are now—as young women just stepping forth into adulthood, blinking in the burst of sunlight that is the realization that we’ve left girlhood behind and the wondering what that might mean in the nitty gritty of everyday living.

First, though, let’s try to lay down our assumptions and presuppositions in the dust at the wayside. There are many definitions of femininity thrown at us today—the highly educated, in-your-face businesswoman who demands perfect equality, the half-naked glamour queen on glossy grocery store magazine racks, the gentle, mousey Victorian lady with lowered eyes, the soccer mom with screaming kids and a to-do list longer than her minivan, the damsel humming to herself in a lonely tower as she waits patiently for her prince to ride up the hill and bring her away to a golden palace with diamond sunbursts. All of these are crooked distortions of what God intended woman to be, and we must forget them as we seek out His original intent for us. He did not mean for a woman to be a spineless, mindless “angel of the house” with little use but to look pretty and encourage morality. Nor did He purpose for His daughters to be domineering and independent creatures that only differ from men in their anatomy. Far from it. He made us to be beautiful and good and to bring glory to Him. But what does that look like?

Take a walk with me through the pages of the Word and the writings of wise saints, and let’s find out.


Hännah Schlaudt is a nineteen year old sophomore at Grove City College, where she is pursuing a double major in English and Christian Thought. She can most often be found seated beneath a tree with a book in hand. While she dislikes hop scotch, she does admit to a penchant for the Lindy Hop, which she does in between games of frisbee. Her writing can also be found at www.forthrightfixation.com.