Beauty from the Heart: October 2005

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

What is femininity?

When I was little, I wanted to be a tomboy. "Girly-girls," in my opinion, were the ones who were fascinated with Barbie and Ken, and wore makeup. I never wanted to be too dainty to build forts and play tag. Besides, pink was my least favorite color. I was destined to be a tomboy, right?
Wrong. I never achieved my dream of becoming a tomboy, partially because I dislike sports, and partially because, in spite of myself at times, I was a girl.
But now I look back and see, my whole point of view about what it meant to be feminine was flawed. If girlhood were defined as I defined it, by fingernail polish, skirts and earrings, then the essence of girlhood would only be skin deep. But there is much more to it. True femininity is based on the possession of virtues appropriate for a godly woman to have.
In the following posts, Kristin and I will be writing on certain aspects of biblical femininity and digging further into this subject, so stay tuned!

posted by Hannah

Saturday, October 15, 2005

And The Greatest of These....

A friend of mine posted on her blog, on the subject of what true love is. She said,

In English class today, my professor asked us to list ten words we associate with our first kiss.

I raised my hand bashfully. "What if you've never been kissed?"

A few people chuckled in the back of the class.

"Uh..." My professor sat with a look of consternation on her face. "Then... list ten words describing what you think your first kiss will be like."

I was stumped. A "romantic" relationship with the opposite sex is something I've always avoided... and ignored.... And yes, I do enjoy a romantic movie now and then. (My personal favourites are when the male party dies a sudden, tragic death and the female party lives the rest of her life in celibate sainthood... wait... have I ever seen a movie with that plot? No. Guess not. However, those are the stories I make up.) But then I step back and have to laugh at the "rose-coloured glasses" the world looks through at "love." According to the world, love is really nothing more than a hormonal imbalance... or indigestion.

I like the way 1 Corinthians 13 describes love...

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails... And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (verses 4-8a, 13)

The dictionary's definition of "love" is "a deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness. A feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person with whom one is disposed to make a pair; the emotion of sex and romance."
If you notice, that definition is fraught with words which indicate that love is a "feeling" or a "desire." But love does not originate from a feeling. If it did, then it would be reasonable for a mother to disown her child the first moment he displeases her. Yet any loving mother would never think of such a thing. Why? Because true love for another is not rooted on emotions. If it were, it would be frail indeed.

I think that is what Shakespeare was trying to express the essence of true love when he wrote the following sonnet:

Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken,
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unkown, although his hieght be taken
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But it bears out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error, and upon me prov'd,
I never writ, nor no man ever lov'd.

--William Shakespeare, Sonnet CXVI

Jesus said, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13) The love that He speaks of here is not, and cannot, be defined by any dictionary.

posted by Hannah

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Guest Post by Spunky Homeschool

My mom, also known as Spunky, posted this a while back for a "blog party". I thought I would share part of it with you..

Choosing Home

I was raised in the 70's in a suburb just minutes from downtown Detroit. I vaguely remember the '68 riots and vividly remember the day Nixon resigned. Abortion became legal. And in the era of ERA (Equal Rights Amendment) and the feminine mystique, women were declaring their independence. Ant that is exactly the way I was raised. To be self sufficient and ready to tackle life head on. My dad used to introduce me to his collegues as "the future president of IBM". That sounded nice but there was one problem. I was not very outgoing. A true wall flower. In high school, I would have been voted the girl most likely to be forgotten had anyone remembered to vote for me. But I got good grades and did what I was told and that was enough to get me accepted to the UM.

When I left home, I told my parents that I was going to college to get a degree. And if by chance I decided to get married, it would be to a Dr. That way, we could live in a large house and I would never see him only his money. And I would be free to pursue my own interests.

God had other ideas.

I gave my life to Christ my first year there. Through excellent discipleship and fellowship God was able to root out many false notions that had been deposited in my youth. Christ also gave me an inner confidence that I had lacked. But I held firm on marriage. It wasn't for me. Many others were there for an "Mrs." degree but I was all business. I majored in computers. This suited my logical and analaytical skills fairly well. And an added bonus, the corporations were hungry for women in this field so I figured finding a job would be easy after graduation.

But then I had to go and meet Steve. So marraige was for me after all. We met in January of 84, my junior year. He was dating someone else and had recently become a Christian. I had no time for a social life. I was working 2 jobs and with my studies I didn't want to think about a serious relationship. God, however, had other plans. By September he was available and by October we were engaged. I couldn't believe it. (And neither could he.) We set a date for May 31, 1986.

This was also the time when I took my first "real" job as a computer sales representative for a company in our area. I quickly excelled in my job. I was earning nearly $4000 a month selling computers. The PC industry was booming and so was my career. Full steam ahead. Maybe I would be president of IBM after all. But then came the choice.

Continue reading Choosing Home.

posted by Kristin

Monday, October 03, 2005

About Us

Why did God create women? What is true beauty? What's the point of purity? Modesty? Femininity? We've wondered too; but the answers we've received from our culture have been lacking.

Ask the world what womanhood is about and you'll get a blank stare in return. No one knows. Young women are devoid of vision beyond achieving fame, fortune and a dream career. From feminism to immodesty, apathy to confusion, our culture's idea of womanhood is distorted at best.

God had something greater in mind. From the start of creation, women were designed to live beautifully.

But God's idea of beauty is not about physical characteristics or the approval of others. It's about loving the God who created us for His glory and enjoying the unique design He has given each and every person.

Inner beauty, however, is distinct. It's not intrinsic. It doesn't come naturally or easily. This beauty slowly develops in the heart as a believer learns to love Christ more deeply. The more passionate for the Gospel we become, the more our hearts grow to reflect His image.

The goal of Beauty from the Heart is to nurture this growing beauty, and to counter the culture's ideal for womanhood with God's breathtaking vision.

About the Writers:

'Anne' is Lindsey Wagstaffe's middle name, and it must fit her well, because most of her friends compare her to Anne of Green Gables. Hannah says that Lindsey is accident prone, but she prefers to think of herself as 'adventure prone'. She delights to tell about the incredibly dramatic time that she broke her back, the time she accidentally burnt off some of her hair while daydreaming near a candle, and the time she got lost in a menacing forest, was stung by a giant bee, and had to be carried away on a friend’s back. If her life was ever dull, Lindsey can't remember it.

Her more sane hobbies include public speaking, concocting interesting "food" in the kitchen, and taking long walks in the California sunshine. Lindsey also loves to read the writings of great dead men—Jonathan Edwards, John Owen, Charles Spurgeon, and C.S. Lewis, to name a few. Her favorite living authors include J.I. Packer, R.C. Sproul, C.J. Mahaney, Jerry Bridges, John Piper, and Hannah Farver.

Lindsey lives with her family outside of San Francisco, California.

Hannah Farver is seventeen years old and hates trying to summarize her life in a few paragraphs. But she'll try anyway. While her middle name isn't Anne, her two favorite literary heroines are Elisabeth Elliot and Elizabeth Bennett. (Can you guess Hannah's middle name?) Another little known fact about her life is that she has a fear of escalators and chickens. Really.

As an extroverted introvert, she enjoys belting out songs from old musicals as well as hiding in her room with a good book. Most days, however, she can be found working on her two big loves--writing and public speaking. In her spare time, Hannah tries to keep Lindsey out of harm's way while discovering the recipe for the perfect cup of chai.

She lives with her parents, brother and two sisters outside of Ft. Worth, Texas.

Hannah and Lindsey

Want to email us? Our address is contact.bfth[at]gmail.com

Saturday, October 01, 2005

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